How to be in a Beautiful State of Mind

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There are few motivational speakers that I enjoy listening to, and Tony Robbins is definitely one of them. He was here in my hometown last week for a talk, but I couldn’t make it. I watched his show later thanks to someone uploading it online. His talk inspired me in many ways, as usual, and as a result I decided to blog about it.

How to break free from a foggy state of mind (Which I, by the way, call it a confused state of mind), follow these steps as suggested by Tony Robbins.

  1. Focus on your goals. What is it that you want. It is really important to focus on what matters to you and don’t allow yourself to think about things that don’t matter. Don’t focus on the negatives, but focus on the positives.

So, the first step is to know what you want.

  1. Take massive action – execution. Do something about your wants. Start somewhere and put on some work to get some results.
  2. Have believe and faith in your dream.  Believe in God. He calls it “GRACE.”

Now this may sound simple, but it is challenging for many to put their goals into action. When we take an action, we either accomplish our goals or we don’t. When that happens what do we do? We try again, again, and again until we accomplish what we are after. We eventually find a way to get the work done.

There are two different state of minds: lower and higher state. We tend to be happier and positive when we are at a higher state of mind. When we are in the lower state of mind, we often feel stressed, depressed and or anxious. When you think negatively, it puts you in a lower state of mind. When you are in a higher state of mind, you achieve your goals. You usually gain victory and success, but there is no self-fulfillment. You are not content from inside. We are accomplishing our goals and getting things done, but there is no inner peace or happiness. When this happens we do things what seems to be right or do things for the sake of others. And in the process, we forget about ourselves. There is no self-fulfillment because we are too busy making others happy that we tend to forget about our own happiness. What Tony suggests is that we shouldn’t be in higher or lower state, but to be in a ‘beautiful state’ of mind. A beautiful state of mind means being happy with the outcome. It’s okay to think about one’s happiness as well. It is a well known fact that you can’t make everyone happy, so might as well do things that will put your heart at ease. People often mistake achievement with happiness. I liked the saying that goes “Don’t achieve to be happy, but happily achieve your goals.” It is very true if you think about it, we chase our dreams and goals with the intention that if we accomplish our goals then we will be happy. Once I get a higher payment job then I will be happy. Do you think that to be true? Wrong! Worldly affairs and just accomplishing goals will not bring true happiness. There is more to it.  It is important to have a purpose in life, and to go after our true purpose. To gain internal happiness we should  always be in a state of gratitude.

To be in a beautiful state of mind means putting an end to your sufferings. Figure out what emotions bother you, and then find out what triggers those emotions.

We don’t have control over what people say or do, but we have control over how we react to it. Lastly,  I would like to end this post with my favorite line, “trade your expectations with appreciation,” and I couldn’t agree more.

His piece of work was definitely stimulating for me, I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I did.

 

 

 

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The Gift of Giving: Gratitude and Happiness

What is the connection between happiness and gratitude? Do we need to be grateful in order to be happy? We are all seeking the one thing, and yet we are also very different in our approach. I watched this TED talk on happiness and gratitude not very long ago, and it made me reflect – Is happiness born from gratitude? Can we start experiencing more happiness when we start appreciating little things in life? The next few paragraphs are my random thoughts, so bear with me.

As I have been told every moment is an opportunity, and that is the key to happiness. I have yet to discover things for myself, but the minute I started being thankful for little things in my life…feelings of joy started to flow into my life. We are not born with this mind-set ofcourse, but we can make it a habit. I also think there is a joy in gift of giving. The more you give out, you receive triple the amount back.

What we imagine, we become, and what we think, we create. Hence, I truly believe that our thoughts and our minds are powerful tool in shaping us into who we want to become. If I am in charge and in control of my thoughts then I am in control of my well-being. While people are aware of the importance of physical health (we look after our body, we go for our routine check, and we spend endless hours in the gym to be healthy), attitudes toward mental health are different. Why aren’t we as concerned? Why is physical health given more importance than mental health? I keep raising this question, and it is amazing to see that people are now acknowledging it as well.

I think it boils down to one thing: Change the way you think about things. We miss out on every little things in life, and beautiful moments pass by if we are not present in the moment. We show gratitude towards people, and appreciate sweet gestures when we start to make a mental notice of our surroundings. So take a moment to appreciate when someone does something good for you, next time. Never take things for granted! You may not show them in words (as not everyone can be expressive), but accept it in your heart, and be thankful.

And when you are happy and show love to the things you want, you don’t just attract them, but will have no room for fear, insecurity, resentment, envy, and doubt. If you fear that what you are aiming for is impossible then just believe in your vision, imagine it and enjoy the process. Don’t worry about the outcome, as everything will fall into place. Just BELIEVE it. ENVISION it. And dream big! Many people are confused, not because they don’t know what they want, but because they are fearful and may question their ability whether they can or cannot. And they may or may not overcome it.

I also read an interesting research on health and happiness. I think it is no surprise that when we are fully energised, we get a lot of things done. Hence the point of the research was that in order to increase our level of energy, we need to be getting enough sleep and exercise, as the two are the predictors of wellbeing.

Research also showed happier people are more interested in the problems of the world, and in the problems of the people. They are more often and willingly to offer help. If you are asking well then, what might bring you happiness? – It is different to each one of us, but novelty and challenge contribute to people’s happiness. What is challenging for you might not be challenging for someone else, so you have to know what is right for you.

Recently, as I have learned, outcome does not matter as much. Just enjoy the process. I hope some can relate to this post or hoping that you can take something positive out of it.

 

 

How I am Preparing for 2016: The Importance of Goal Setting

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I think, goal making requires our conscious decision of what it is that we want to achieve –  a change in our behavior? Improving our quality of life? Whatever is the reason, the truth is that small and realistic goals are easy to achieve, and they are often measurable. Our goal don’t have to be vague. The simpler it is, the better.

But why writing our goal is such an important practice? Because writing thoughts down on a paper creates a sense of awareness into our minds, and it puts it into perspective for us.

 Here’s my short-term goals for 2016. Also, sharing them here will help me achieve my goals, and I can hold myself accountable for it.

…some food for thought:

1. To start my day early & be more productive
I am not a morning person, but I always wanted to be one. And, so the goal for me is to hopefully turn into one– why is that important? Well, because it is. I can dedicate a whole new post about the benefits of waking up early, so I’ll leave that for now. But here’s why I want to start my day early: To meditate; to plan my day better; to eat breakfast; and to read for 15 to 20 minutes, before I start work. And yes it is possible because I have tried it, it isn’t going to be easy in the beginning, but with practice it can get better.

2. To exercise
I always wanted to stay active. I am going to set aside 1.5 to 2 hours a day for my workouts in the evening – we are not perfect let’s face it, and I have my days too when I don’t want to hit the gym or go for a walk, but I’ll make sure to make time for it. The idea is to find an activity that you really enjoy.

But really, we shouldn’t be limited to going to the gym only or running outside. There are great workout videos on YouTube that you can watch. On my lazy days, I do two sets of 5 minute ab workout at home when I am not in the mood to go to the gym. You can find many such 5 minute clips on YouTube. It is fun, it is easy to follow, and you don’t have to step out.

Having said that, I feel blessed to have access to a gym closer to where I live now.

3. To meditate
I am practicing mindfulness – it is work in progress, but hoping one day I can master it. I will use this time to reflect on the past. And look how far I’ve come along. I will also be using this time to stay in the present and appreciate life for what it is. As the saying goes, our pasts shape our future, and so there are no regrets in life but just learning. This is what I believe. I am a product of my experiences, they shape us into who we are today; and if it wasn’t for these experiences, we wouldn’t been the kind of persons we are today. As I always say, having a perspective is vital. I think a person without one is someone living life in a bubble –  and too afraid to let go.

4. To read books
To find time to read as many books, and articles as I can. I am aiming to finish at least one or two books by the end of December 2015.

These are my short-term goals for the next couple months. I am hoping to build on this list as I move forward.

What are your short-term goals? How are you preparing for 2016? I would love to hear your thoughts. Comment below!

Building Positivity in a Chaotic World

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“There’s something good in every day” – A mantra I believe in.

I have written this post on a different social platform, and here it is again.

What is it like to be in the right state of mind? Does it mean surrounding ourselves with positive people and having a positive outlook on life?

Recently I read an article about ‘the secret of getting into a right frame of mind.’

According to the article, the right state of mind is defined as being prepared and believing in our success.

Having a positive mind-set is not just about having pleasant thoughts, but preparing ourselves for whatever it is we want to achieve.

It takes practice, hard work and dedication.

While having a positive attitude is good, it is not enough.

Ultimately it’s our actions that influence our brain.

As the saying goes…

“When you are prepared you are confident, and when you are confident you know you will succeed.”

And as Henry Ford said…

“Whether you believe you can or you can’t, you’re right.”

Often we harm ourselves with negative self-talk that holds us back.

We don’t take risks, we feel inadequate, we choose not to be vulnerable, and so that we end up creating these barriers and limit ourselves from all the possibilities out there.

We choose in-action over action.

That can be changed from a simple mindset shift from ‘What I Can’t Do’ to ‘What I Can Do.’

There are also some simple actions we can take to bring more positivity into our lives…

POSITIVITY BOOSTERS                                                

  • Always smile – Smiling is a source of positive energy not just to us, but to those around us
  • Be Active – Find an activity that you actually enjoy and make it part of your life. It can be as simple as going for a walk or dancing in your living room!!
  • Learn Something Daily – Pick up a hobby and learn a new skill. Choose a subject that will help you excel and study it. Learning boosts our self-confidence
  • Give – Be kind and generous – it’s one of the best feelings in the world!!
  • Be Mindful – Practice self-awareness and live in the present moment. It’s impossible to get upset about the past or worry about the future when you’re ‘in’ the present
  • Connect – A simple ‘hello’ to a stranger or a phone call to a friend can boost our positivity
  • Reframe Failure – See failure as a way to learn and grow.
  • Focus on Gratitude – Take a moment each day to focus on the things you are grateful for. This will make you more aware of the positive things around you.

Please find the blog link below:

Beyond Attitude – Building Positivity In A Chaotic World

Lastly, what do you do for staying positive?

Five Steps to Mental Well-being

Here’s another blog entry after ages. I got busy with massive school work.
I have been reading quite a bit on mental health  because it is the focus of my dissertation. I came across this one article that caught my attention. The article points out few steps for leading a positive mental attitude and the positive factors that are associated with keeping a positive outlook. According to the study, mental well-being is more than just being happy. There is more to it than what we think we know. It is about feelings of contentment, enjoyment, confidence and engagment with the world.

Here are five steps to a healthy mind that the NHS article points out:

1. Connect with people around you: Your friends, neighbor, coworker, and family. Engage with the world and spend time in the presence of others.
2. Be active – find an activity that you enjoy and make that part of your life. It can be as simple as going for a walk.
3. Keep learning – pick up a hobby or learn a new skill, as it adds a sense of achievement and that a lone can boost our self-esteem and self confidence.
4. Give to others – be kind and generous towards others. A simple thank you and a smile can make a lot of difference.
5. Be mindful of the people around you – take notice of everday life and live in the present moment.

I hope you find this helpful and use it as a starting point.

For more on mental well-being you can refer to the NHS site.
NHS Site

How to Make Stress Your Friend!

Video_Kelly-McGonigal_How-to-make-stress-your-friendToday’s blog shares my favorite TED talk, which is about making stress your friend. A good friend of mine introduced me to this because I am a sucker for motivational talks.

I am really keen on positive affiliation. What and how we think about certain things can have a huge positive/negative impact on our health. So back to the Kelly McGonigal, she asked her audience, “do you believe stress is harmful for your health?” The ultimate point she was trying to make was that you can make stress to be bad for you if you believe that to be the case. What you think matters! She also asked “can changing how you think about stress make you healthier?” the science says yes.

When you change your mind about stress, you change your body’s response to stress. In other words how you think about stress actually matters! It is pretty fascinating to me, how our minds have the power to change the outcome of what we are feeling. It is all in our control whether we want to be stressed out or whether we take stress as a way that it is preparing our body for whatever thing we are stressing for. If your heart is pounding when next time you are up and giving a presentational talk or conversing with friends, then think of it as it is giving you energy to do that task. Pretty amazing eh?

Another interesting point was that oxytocin is a stress hormone that is tend to make you compassionate, caring and the job is so strengthen your relationship with others. A study was conducted in which they found that people age 34 to 93 with financial issues or any family crisis had an increased risk of dying by 30%. Whereas, people who spend time caring for others showed no stress related in dying risks. So caring created resilience.

How we think and act can transform our experiences of stress.

And I want to wrap this blog with Kelly’s message that “chasing meaning is better for your health than trying to avoid discomfort.” –-It basically means to trust yourself with anything that you follow and feel passionate about and trust yourself to handle the stress that comes with it.
To listen to the talk, click on the link below:
 Make Stress your Friend